How to Shift Your Perspective for a Happier Life: Insights from Two Monks

Ever notice how two people can go through the exact same experience, but one walks away excited while the other feels defeated? It’s not the situation that’s different—it’s how they see it. I saw this often while working in the hospital.

Some time ago, I took care of two close friends who were involved in a terrible motorcycle accident with a large truck. It was simply a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. They spent a while in the hospital, recovering from multiple injuries. One was furious, constantly lashing out about what had happened, while the other was grateful and hopeful for a second chance at life. You can probably guess which one went home—and even healed—faster.

This memory reminded me of a Zen parable about two monks arriving in a new town. The story shows how our attitudes can turn the same situation into something amazing or something awful.

And the best part? We can apply this lesson every day to change how we experience life.

The Story of the Two Monks:

This story highlights a simple truth: our experiences are shaped by how we see the world. The town didn't change—the monks' perceptions did. We’ve all heard that changing our perspective can change our life—it’s not a new concept. But the real challenge is figuring out how to do it effectively in our own unique situations.

How to Apply This Lesson in Daily Life

Here are a few ideas to get you started. Maybe one or two will resonate with you, or perhaps you'll find value in using all of them. The key is to choose the approach—or combination—that makes the biggest impact on your life and needs. Give them a try, and don’t hesitate to fine-tune them to fit your unique situation.

1. Check Your Mindset

Start by getting honest with yourself. Are you dragging negativity from past experiences into new ones? Or are you keeping an open mind? Becoming aware of your inner dialogue is the first step to shifting your perspective. With practice, you can approach new situations with a fresh, positive outlook.

Try This: Start a daily journal where you jot down your thoughts and feelings. It doesn’t need to be perfect—just pay attention to how you’re reacting emotionally in different situations. Over time, you’ll start to see patterns that you can work on changing.

2. Set Positive Expectations

Like the monks, your expectations often shape your reality. If you expect things to go badly, they probably will—it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. But if you approach situations with optimism, you’re more likely to find positive outcomes. It’s not about being unrealistically hopeful; it’s about staying open to good things happening.

Try This: Before heading into a meeting or social event, take a moment to set a positive intention. For example: “This meeting will go well... I’ll have a great time... I’m going to speak clearly and communicate my ideas effectively,” and so on. Remind yourself to stay open to the possibilities. The universe works in magical ways.

3. Choose Your Response

Life throws curveballs, and how you respond can make all the difference. By training yourself to pause and choose your response instead of reacting impulsively, you gain control over your experience.

Try This: When faced with a challenge, pause, take a deep breath (or three) and ask yourself, “How can I view this differently?” This simple exercise could help change how you perceive the situation.

4. Practice Gratitude

Gratitude is a powerful tool that shifts your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant in your life. By practicing gratitude regularly, you train your mind to seek out the positive, which in turn transforms how you experience the world.

Try This: Each day, write down or intentionally think of three things you’re thankful for. Over time, you’ll naturally start to focus on the good in your life.

Bringing It Home:

The story of the two monks and the new town is a powerful reminder that we shape our own experiences. The world around us often reflects our inner thoughts and attitudes. By being mindful of our mindset, setting positive expectations, choosing how we respond, and focusing on gratitude, we can change how we see things—and ultimately, our reality.

Every new situation, challenge, or opportunity is like a road you’re about to travel. You decide whether it’s a smooth, scenic route or one full of bumps and detours. How you navigate it—whether with positivity and openness or negativity and fear—will shape the journey ahead. The lesson from the two monks isn’t just an old story; it’s a practical approach to living a happier, more peaceful life every day.

So, the next time you’re faced with something new, think of the monks, and choose to see the good. It might just change your entire journey.

You got this.

Some time ago, I took care of two close friends who were involved in a terrible motorcycle accident with a large truck. It was simply a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. They spent a while in the hospital, recovering from multiple injuries. One was furious, constantly lashing out about what had happened, while the other was grateful and hopeful for a second chance at life. You can probably guess which one went home—and even healed—faster.

This memory reminded me of a Zen parable about two monks arriving in a new town. The story shows how our attitudes can turn the same situation into something amazing or something awful.

And the best part? We can apply this lesson every day to change how we experience life.

The Story of the Two Monks:

Two monks were traveling together and arrived at a town neither had visited before. Curious about what kind of place it was, they asked a local resident.

The first monk approached the man and asked, 'What is this town like?'

The man replied, 'What was your previous town like?'

'It was dreadful,' the monk said. 'The people were selfish, unfriendly, and cold.'

The man answered, 'Well, you'll find this town to be much the same.'

The first monk walked away, feeling disheartened.

Then the second monk asked the same man, 'What is this town like?'

The man replied, 'What was your previous town like?'

The monk smiled and said, 'It was wonderful! The people were kind, welcoming, and warm-hearted.'

The man replied, 'You will find this town to be much the same.'

The second monk continued on his way, feeling optimistic.

This story highlights a simple truth: our experiences are shaped by how we see the world. The town didn't change—the monks' perceptions did. We’ve all heard that changing our perspective can change our life—it’s not a new concept. But the real challenge is figuring out how to do it effectively in our own unique situations.

How to Apply This Lesson in Daily Life

Here are a few ideas to get you started. Maybe one or two will resonate with you, or perhaps you'll find value in using all of them. The key is to choose the approach—or combination—that makes the biggest impact on your life and needs. Give them a try, and don’t hesitate to fine-tune them to fit your unique situation.

1. Check Your Mindset

Start by getting honest with yourself. Are you dragging negativity from past experiences into new ones? Or are you keeping an open mind? Becoming aware of your inner dialogue is the first step to shifting your perspective. With practice, you can approach new situations with a fresh, positive outlook.

Try This: Start a daily journal where you jot down your thoughts and feelings. It doesn’t need to be perfect—just pay attention to how you’re reacting emotionally in different situations. Over time, you’ll start to see patterns that you can work on changing.

2. Set Positive Expectations

Like the monks, your expectations often shape your reality. If you expect things to go badly, they probably will—it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy. But if you approach situations with optimism, you’re more likely to find positive outcomes. It’s not about being unrealistically hopeful; it’s about staying open to good things happening.

Try This: Before heading into a meeting or social event, take a moment to set a positive intention. For example: “This meeting will go well... I’ll have a great time... I’m going to speak clearly and communicate my ideas effectively,” and so on. Remind yourself to stay open to the possibilities. The universe works in magical ways.

3. Choose Your Response

Life throws curveballs, and how you respond can make all the difference. By training yourself to pause and choose your response instead of reacting impulsively, you gain control over your experience.

Try This: When faced with a challenge, pause, take a deep breath (or three) and ask yourself, “How can I view this differently?” This simple exercise could help change how you perceive the situation.

4. Practice Gratitude

Gratitude is a powerful tool that shifts your focus from what’s lacking to what’s abundant in your life. By practicing gratitude regularly, you train your mind to seek out the positive, which in turn transforms how you experience the world.

Try This: Each day, write down or intentionally think of three things you’re thankful for. Over time, you’ll naturally start to focus on the good in your life.

Bringing It Home:

The story of the two monks and the new town is a powerful reminder that we shape our own experiences. The world around us often reflects our inner thoughts and attitudes. By being mindful of our mindset, setting positive expectations, choosing how we respond, and focusing on gratitude, we can change how we see things—and ultimately, our reality.

Every new situation, challenge, or opportunity is like a road you’re about to travel. You decide whether it’s a smooth, scenic route or one full of bumps and detours. How you navigate it—whether with positivity and openness or negativity and fear—will shape the journey ahead. The lesson from the two monks isn’t just an old story; it’s a practical approach to living a happier, more peaceful life every day.

So, the next time you’re faced with something new, think of the monks, and choose to see the good. It might just change your entire journey.